In Assholic Move, Russell Brand Forces Wardrobe Girl to Show Him Her Tits [Video]

In a case of movie title imitating life, Russell Brand's facial hair refused to begin filming Eric Idle's new musical What About Dick? until he convinced a wardrobe assistant to flash him. He actually delayed production for two hours, haranguing her the entire time. A source said:

She was having none of it - at first. But when it started to look like they weren't going to get any work done she gave in and flashed him.

Did you guys know that if you bring your yogi to public appearances and talk about the importance of being spiritual on Jimmy Fallon and shit, you get a karmic pass—nay, the natural right!—to see the sweater puppies of any below-the-line person on your movie set? If you're Aldous Snow, you do! (And, let's admit it: the line between Aldous Snow and Russell Brand is blending every passing day.)

Apparently the dude gets away with murder on most movies, but this time co-star and comic Billy Connolly took him aside for a stern talking-to. So, yup, Hollywood is full of professionals and no breasts are safe. Good Lord, imagine what Brand might have requested from a PA? [The Sun]

Katie Holmes has enrolled Suri at The World School, an exclusive $40,000-a-year institution meant for the jet setting elite, with 20 campuses on five continents in order to allow for uninterrupted education whilst traveling. One can only assume that the cubbies are Jonathan Adler-designed and framed with gold leaf and crushed quail eggs, and the teachers are robots that run on national and international currency. XOXO, Gossip Girl. [Daily Mail]

The judging table of singing competitions is quickly becoming a curse to celebrity marriages: first Britney Spears and Jason Trawick, and now Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon. Cannon's pissed that Carey, who just signed on to judge American Idol didn't join him on his competing show America's Got Talent (even after he "dangled incentives" like jewelry, a spa vacation, the payment of a $15 million "gift") and their holy union is now in jeopardy, I guess. [National Enquirer]

Did you guys hear how great Pitbull was? No? Well, let Pitbull tell you in his new single "Get It Started," wherein he boasts about his recent tour and completely ignores hook girl Shakira draping herself all over a balcony while singing the wistful chorus. Sample rhyme:

Big news, Pitbull, Tom Cruise, Mumbai
I lit up their December nights like the Fourth of July, Vanilla Sky.

In other words, If On A Winter's Night A Traveler.

Holy Shit Great Idea Batman, Lynn Cohen, otherwise known as Magda from Sex And The City, has been cast as Mags in The Hunger Games. I buy you rolling pin, Katniss! So you can make pies for man! (But seriously, she was really good in Munich.) [VH1]

Coutney Stodden and Doug Hutchison are having marital problems and have signed on to VH1's Couples Therapy but will likely still emerge as Courtney Stodden and Doug Hutchinson, if not moreso. [Page Six]

Kim Kardashian spent five hours at the salon. Let's play a game called "Hair Salon or Intellectual Salon?" THE ANSWER MIGHT SURPRISE YOU, but it won't. [Daily Mail]If Tara Reid falls down in Sweden, and these two Irish twins in a band named Jedward were the only ones to see it, did she make a sound? [Daily Mail]Barbra Streisand has a stalker. The real question is, who would go that out of their way to watch Babs and James Brolin play canasta for 5 hours? [National Enquirer]Kate Upton wants to go out with One Direction's Harry Styles, thereby merging to form one Google Trend Transformer. [FemaleFirst.co.uk]Oh my God, this is the best. Elton John and Neil Patrick Harris take their families on annual vacations together and there is a PICTURE. [People]Patrick Dempsey may have Tweeted a big Grey's Anatomy spoiler: a photo of Eric Dane in a hospital bed. ABC told him to take it down. [Entertainment Weekly]Former correspondent Steve Carell admitted that The Daily Show can cross the line for him: "It's one thing poking fun at people who deserve it, but there was that flip side of shooting fish in a barrel. It's just cruel." [THR]Jacqueline Laurita's hatred of Teresa Giudice made her drink, if you give any fucks at all about the Real Housewives of Azkaban New Jersey. [Gather CelebsWhat does the ghost of a martini look like? Buy Frank Sinatra's $7.7 million New York penthouse and find out. Or just click this, for free. [Radar Online]Lily Allen will be changing her professional moniker to her married name, Lily Rose Cooper. [Guardian.co.uk]Anne Hathaway walked around with Adam Schulman, a parasol and a really cute outfit on yesterday. [Daily Mail]Chay Tates distracted a Cardinals practice because errybody was like UNNNNN, NA NA NA NA. [Arizona SB Nation]Madonna got annoyed with daughter Lourdes for giving herself Skrillex hair. [Timeslive.co.za]Snoop Liondog, Esq. wants to be an American Idol judge. [Washington Post]David Beckham admits that having obsessive-compulsive disorder is "tiring." [Musicrooms.net]Here is George Clooney, sexy scamp, smirk machine and caricature of own self, filming a Mercedes commercial in Italy. [Daily Mail]A few things about these shots of the upcoming Liberace biopic Behind The Candelabra: Matt Damon looks kind of sexy as a tanning-oil-slathered '70s guy. Furthermore, Dan Aykroyd's expression in the fourth slide is one that I would like engraved into my tombstone. [Pop Sugar]Ashmila Kutchernis snuggled at the Hong Kong airport on the way to Bali. [Vicky B. Online]Macaulay Culkin is still maybe on heroin, or isn't, according to this insanely invasive thing. [National Enquirer]Some royal human named Kate Middletown Abbey did the wave. [ABC News]Martha Stewart's grandkids' playroom appears to have cost roughly as much as a burgeoning nation. [People]

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Terrible New Arizona Law Forces Horrified Parents to Watch their Babies Die [Roe V World]

It's tough to find a job in this sluggish economy, but now, thanks to a law about to take effect in the state of Arizona, there may soon be a need for something called a "fetal grief counselor" in the American Southwest. Thanks to anti-abortion lawmakers' efforts, starting Thursday, mothers of babies with fatal fetal birth defects will be forced to carry their pregnancies to term, give birth, and then watch their babies die. See? Republicans are job creators, after all.

Earlier this year, Arizona governor/ terrible person Jan Brewer signed into law a measure that would ban abortions in the state after 20 weeks' gestation with no exception for fetal abnormality — but unlike other 20 week bans, Arizona's law counts gestation from the first day of a woman's last missed period. It's the most extreme abortion ban in the nation, and it's especially heartless when you consider that many fatal fetal abnormalities can't be detected until after that point in a pregnancy, which means that if you're pregnant in Arizona, you're placing a pretty bold bet that your fetus won't have any defects it can't survive. And if it does end up completely non-viable? Tough fetus, ladies. You should have thought of that before you had sex!

In anticipation of the disastrous effects House Bill 2036 will have on Arizona families, groups like the MISS Foundation and Embrace are directing their already-stretched-thin resources toward Arizona, where they anticipate having to help families to prepare for what's known as a "fatal birth," or the birth of a stillborn child, or a child who cannot survive for long outside of the womb. In addition to preparing families for "fatal births," they work to plan funeral services for children who are often wanted and mourned, and provide counseling to the families left behind, including women who were forced by the state of Arizona to carry a nonviable pregnancy to term.

Of course, 20-week bans are mostly political theater acted out by anti-abortion rights lawmakers who want to sound like big men in front of their rabidly anti-choice constituents — almost all abortions performed in the US occur before 12 weeks' gestation, and, according to Think Progress, only about 100 post-20-week abortions take place in Arizona per year, so if lawmakers want to reduce the number of abortions occurring annually in the US, banning late term procedures isn't the way to do it. Although the procedure is far from common, for the 100 or so Arizona women that need it annually, a late term ban could be disastrous, forcing them to either give birth and watch their babies die or spend considerable time and money traveling out of state for the medical care they've decided is best for their families.

To borrow words from anti-abortion rights, pro-forced ultrasound Pennsylvania governor Tom Corbett, women can just cover their eyes!

[Think Progress]

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